The Endurance to Keep Seeking

In the early stages of my spiritual awakening, I went through a number of venues while trying to carry out into the world all this new information I was assimilating, and seeking healing and answers to personal issues. These venues related to ‘contemporary’ spiritual and holistic thematics, such as Indigo children/people, meditation, energy healing, and so forth.

But even though I had an open mind to the veracity of many of such thematics, not many of them actually resonated with me. That is to say, I physically went to the places; I engaged with people and those in charge; I underwent sessions, meetings, practices, healing, and so forth. Yet, something was still missing.

It’s not that these venues were “wrong” or “bad” in any significant way – nor were they always entirely devoid of meaning. In fact many provided clues, hints, bits and pieces of information and guidance along the way.

But they didn’t click.

Until there was one day when, in a relatively unexpected manner, I received a number of synchronistic messages all telling me to meet a specific practitioner.

This practitioner was not particularly famous or widely known; she did not work in a space with a flashy facade and a colourful awning. I met her in a regular apartment building, at an unassuming space a group had converted to be used for meditation, healing, and other holistic activities.

During the session from this practitioner – it was an aura reading – I received information that was personally meaningful to me. But it wasn’t just that. As I drove my way home, I felt all the way actual physical sensations on the top of my head, in the area of the crown chakra.

The sensation wasn’t painful or particularly unpleasant. But it was there. It existed. This was significant to me, because it was the very first time I actually felt something related with any kind of spiritual or energy work. For the first time I felt something was actually happening, in a practical sense.

When you’re seeking answers to your personal issues and questions, it can often be quite important, first, to get your bum out of the couch (figuratively, and quite possibly literally also) and go out there to find the answers you seek – as opposed to passively hoping for the big answer to fall on your lap ‘one day’.

Second, as you seek these answers they may not appear right away, at the first attempt – or the second, third, etc. Spiritual Awakening, and spiritual progress in general, are, for the most part, not about finding definitive final answers, but about small meaningful steps taken at the appropriate time.

Sometimes it’s not about whether a thematic is valid or not. Sometimes, it’s simply a question of you personally clicking with the topic/healing/practice, and also, perhaps, with the person conveying it.

During your Awakening process you may go through a period or periods where you go through a number of experiences, trials and tests, in an exploratory manner, and during which you may “only” find small bits and pieces of the puzzle. This is because you may actually need to be led through the small cues and pieces of information first, before you are ready to process the bigger ones. Until you are able to be led to answers that meet your inner seeking in a more significant manner.

When you have questions but you seemingly haven’t been able to find the answers to them, sometimes you simply need to keep trying. In this phase it can become important to bear a degree of emotional stamina, of resilience, that allows you to keep searching, keep seeking, keep moving forward – and not lose hope that the true, actual answers for you are out there somewhere.

It is by this moving forward, and the willingness to continually doing so, also, that the human being states his choice and owns his responsibility in his Spiritual Awakening, in a practical, “real life” manner.